The End

The end of the road is here. A journey of 2 years & 2 months ends here. 

I don't understand what happened or how it happened. How does one simply lose feelings for someone that meant the world to them? Is losing feelings even an excuse to break up with someone? Is it even a legitimate term? You hear people breaking up because a partner cheated or is absolutely intolerable. Am I intolerable or did you cheat?  

You made a point before this, you told me that if it was that easy to lose feelings for someone you loved so dearly, the relationship wasn't real enough. You used to condemn others for their breakups and told me that we would never end up like them because you made me promise that we will always work things out no matter how rough the road gets. Did you forget all that? 

You told me you lost that spark we once had and you tried for months now trying to get it back but you couldn't lie to yourself and me any longer. Did you really believe that after being together for years, we'd still have that same spark every second and every minute of the day? I was content with mutual support, caring for each other, listening to each other's experiences, occasional surprises and being one hundred percent loyal to you. To me, those were signs I was in love. To me, those were signs that I was in a stable and mature relationship but I guess that's not what you had in mind as time passed. I tried so hard to keep everything in place that it eventually fell apart. Was I trying too hard? Or was my efforts not enough? Since when did you become so confused? Why didn't you give me a heads up or talk to me about it? Why didn't you make sure we both tried harder and why didn't you settle with the fact that it was enough that we were both happy and we had each other. I tried everything, I really did. 

It's not fair that you left me and it's not fair that you didn't talk to me about it before dropping the bomb on me. Everything I thought I had in place is now falling apart. Everything I thought I knew and everything I stood for is now a blur. I miss you so much and I don't know what to do. I never thought this day would come, I thought we were stronger than this. 

-Zoey